Deviant Nation : Model : Raeli

Name: Raeli

Last Activity: 8 hours ago

Country: United States

Member Since: September 18, 2007

Number of Posts: 1830

Age/Gender: 22 / F

Zodiac Sign: Libra

Sexual Preference: Boys

About Me: I'm the most random person ever. I study physics and math. I skateboard, I do grafitti, I knit, I write, I paint, I ride a bad-ass moped, I'm the sweetest girl you'll ever meet with the dirtiest mouth. I get trashed with my parents. I'll fix my lipgloss before AND after I kick your ass.
I'm the nerd with the sweet ink. I'm the tomboy who's obsessed with MAC makeup. I'm that girl with the Einstein tattoo.

I love: THE EUG, learning, reading, music, art, being active, tattoos. I'm extremely nerdy (President of MU Society of Physics Students) and when I get drunk, I start re-enacting Shakespeare or explaining the curvature of space-time.

I'm a "just one of the guys" girl.

I'm pretentious.

I play tough, but I'm a softy.

I'm a hopeless romantic.

I work out most of my problems while jogging.

I care about others way more than I do for myself.

I've never been able to categorize myself, and I like that.

Mods: black and grey sleeve, chest piece, shin pieces, lower back tattoo, hip tattoo, stomach tattoos, small tattoos behind ears, finger tattoo, nipple piercings, vertical labret, septum piercing, 1" gauged ears

RAWK: I listen to a lot of shit, but at heart, I fucking love punk rock: NOFX, No Use For A Name, BigWig, Good Riddance, Refused, Propagandhi, Bad Religion, LagWaggon, Pennywise, Dag Nasty, From Ashes Rise, Minor Threat, Stike Anyhwere, Bouncing Souls, Mastadon, Neutral Milk Hotel, Converge, Cold War Kids, Comeback Kid, Number 12 Looks Like You, Modest Mouse, POS, The Yeah Yeah Yeah's, Iron and WIne,Built to Spill, Junior Senior, Talib Kweli, Muse, Minus the Bear, Clap Your Hands and Say Yeah, Charlie Parker, Dizzie Gillispie, Thelonius Monk, Miles Davis, John Coltrane, Matisyahu, The Fall of Troy, Broken Social Scene, Gorillaz, The Tony Danza Tap-Dancing Extravaganza, The Postal Service, Bleeding Through, Jedi Mind Tricks, Bright Eyes, And You Will Know Us by the Trail of Dead, Placebo, Small Brown Bike, Explosions in the Sky, Bloc Party, Don Caballero, The Shins, The Weakerthans, Glassjaw, Sick of it All, Snapcase, He Is Legend, Felt, The Killers, Danger Doom, Call Me Lightning, Q and Not U, Darkest Hour, Every Time I Die, Lupe Fiasco, Cursive, Ed Gein, See you Next Tuesday, Saosin, A Wilhelm Scream, Against Me! All Else Failed

Fave Film: Horror, Gore, Suspense, foreign and some comedy.

Read a Book, Read a Book: Books are my life. I buy them compulsively and own wayy too many.

I Dig: learning, loving, MAC makeup, vodka, beards, ink, music, oatmeal, coffee, dry fall days, pillowtalk, running, health, beauty, truth, knowledge, peanut butter, popcorn, and tofu.

Lame: drama, leaving the seat up, when someones asks you a question and doesnt listen to your answer

Makin papes: right now im managing at Hot Topic, waiting for a teaching job to open up at school.

Posted: 09/30/08 at 05:15 PM

advice plz

so......i really want that teaching job. im just not ready to go to grad school right now. everyone at the university is reacting the same way....on one hand they want me to do the job because they know ill be really good at it, but on the other hand, they want me to go to grad school next year. But I have NO IDEA what field to go into. Plus I REALLY need medical insurance. I have some serious shit to take care of and cant go to the doctor.

I got this email this evening:

Shannon,

It is long time I have not heard from you. A few days ago Nico Orsini
told me that probably you would like to stay here for a while and would
not go to graduate school next year, so I have concerns about you. Is
everything OK, Shannon? You are a very talented student, and I always
think you definitely should go to some Ph.D. Program, and your future
will be very bright.I don't want you to stay, and then will lose the
opportunities you should have.

Everyone in life meets some difficult moments not only once. We just
try to pass them, keeping our way to go. I think every problems has
solutions, and just don't let them block your way. Try to dream big,
and you will get it.

I hope you feel comfortable with what I said. I don't know which your
problems are, but being your professor for so many years, and having a
confidence on you, I just would like to let you know what I think.

If you want to talk, just stop by anytime.

Best wishes

shes vietnamese if it sounds weird....

It really upset me. why is everyone seeing this as a let-down? I thought i was doing something good for myself, and now people are making me feel bad about it. And I know this is awful and typical and feminists everywhere hate me (fuck them), but to go to grad school, Id have to move away. I dont think I can leave TheEug. Its not that i couldnt live without him, but i just dont think WE could live without EACH OTHER. I know he would go with me if it came down to it, but he has a really great job and it would be so selfish of me to ask that of him.

I dont know what to do......I mean i DO want to go to grad school but i feel like i cant. Like i cant afford it, i cant move, i just cant. at least right now.....but are they right? if i wait, will i lose my opportunity?

Mood:

like a disappointment.

(20 comments)

Addiction - Model

Owings, MD

22 / F - Attached

Posted: 09/30/08 at 05:20 PM


	DO IT ON YOUR OWN TIME dont let them tell you what to do. its your life and go to grad school when your good and ready.

GraveyardSally - Model

Las Vegas, NV

29 / F - Married

Posted: 09/30/08 at 05:21 PM

i don't see what their problem is. if you want to teach, go for it. school will still be there when you're ready to continue your education.

Raeli - Model

Huntington, WV

22 / F - Attached

Posted: 09/30/08 at 05:22 PM

it just sucks because its their decision whether or not i get the job....it would totally suck if they didnt give it to me just because they thought i could "do better' or something.

GraveyardSally - Model

Las Vegas, NV

29 / F - Married

Posted: 09/30/08 at 05:24 PM

that is really shitty on their part. i hardly see how they'd know what was better for you better than you do.

Raeli - Model

Huntington, WV

22 / F - Attached

Posted: 09/30/08 at 05:26 PM

i know....im just really good at physics and they think you arent successful unless you have a PhD

GraveyardSally - Model

Las Vegas, NV

29 / F - Married

Posted: 09/30/08 at 05:28 PM


	well, i certainly hope you are able to get your job. i'm sure if you explain that you understand where they're coming from but you still hold your ground and make sure they understand why you want the job (because you can only be a poor student for so long without some respite) things should go your way. best of luck to you darlin!

Arin - Model

Eugene, OR

24 / F - Married

Posted: 09/30/08 at 05:41 PM

Lady you are so young, you have all the time in the world to do everything that will make you AND everyone else happy.

Grad school isn't going anywhere and if you have means to go eventually you will make it happen when you need it to happen.

Seriously everyone is always in a rush to be so serious about life. Don't do that. You will be happier in the end.

Don't ever feel bad for doing what you believe is best for yourself! Because its your life and whatever you want to do with it IS OK!!!

You are incredibly smart, however taking a job over grad school, doesn't make you less intelligent. You will know what is right for you and that is all that matters!

Edited By: Arin - 09/30/08 at 05:42 PM

Raeli - Model

Huntington, WV

22 / F - Attached

Posted: 09/30/08 at 05:48 PM

you are smart and i love you.

Arin - Model

Eugene, OR

24 / F - Married

Posted: 09/30/08 at 05:51 PM


	Just calls it like I sees it <3<3<3<3<3

Sylvia - Model

Baltimore, MD

26 / F - Single

Posted: 10/01/08 at 06:14 AM


	thats pretty much everything I would have said haha

Chixor - Model

Louisville, KY

27 / F - Other

Posted: 09/30/08 at 06:33 PM

Do what makes you feel happy NOW. Dont live your life for others. THis only leads to regret.
There is always time for more school later.
Life isnt over at 40, or 50, or even 60 anymore. Hell for most people this is when they finally start living the life they WISHED they had lead at our age.
You are a smart wonderful lady who has a good head on her shoulders and will do the right thing if and when its called for. Not because someone else wants you to.
Much love to you babe, whatever you decide <3

EnidBlank - Model

Ironton, OH

26 / F - Married

Posted: 09/30/08 at 08:22 PM


	i agree with what everyone already said. <3 (((hug!))) and don't feel like a disappointment! at least you stuck with school and finished your bachelors, unlike me who now has to take classes with 19 y.o. kids who make me feel ancient.

Maggie - Model

Fort Lauderdale, FL

25 / F - Attached

Posted: 09/30/08 at 09:14 PM


	You have plenty of time to go onto grad school. I think they could understand that it is your decision and that you would like to do things your way at your own pace. Do what you believe is best for you.

monkey3

Upland, CA

30 / M - Single

Posted: 09/30/08 at 10:18 PM


	really the only thing i can say is do your own thing, make the decisions you feel are right for you. no one else can do that.

rpg - Staff Photographer

Regina, SK

M - Other

Posted: 10/01/08 at 06:26 AM

If you're not going to be happy leaving someone behind, or for whatever other reasons you have, then you just won't excel at grad school and it would be a waste of time.

Do it only if you are going to be happy doing it. and do whatever you think will make you happy.

Life is full of decisions. That doesn't mean that 10 years from now, you'll look back and say "I should have.....".....life is full of those too. But really, there's no way to avoid THAT either. Follow your heart.

Raeli - Model

Huntington, WV

22 / F - Attached

Posted: 10/01/08 at 07:05 PM


	thats what im thinking...if i just went and did it and josh and i tried to live separately, i would be so miserable that i would do badly. It would be like living without a lung.

Jersey - Moderator

Jersey, 0

28 / F - Other

Posted: 10/01/08 at 10:19 AM

Ah, sometimes people think they are being helpful but really causing more pressure than they realise. It's flattering but to be put under such pressure because someone or a group of people think you are beyond capable is awful and I appreciate the way you must be feeling now.

Make sure you do what is right for you. And if that means right now doing nothing, then do nothing. If in doubt, do nowt.

If you are as able and bright as I think you are, and everyone else does, then your life will be filled with plenty of opportunities like this for you to chose from. Don't ever get into the habit of doing something to make someone happy or what is expected of you, because you will be miserable and its a hard habit to break.

And if this was the right thing for you to be doing, you would have jumped at the chance and not questioned it, so go with your gut instinct missy. We all believe in you and your judgement.

Edited By: Jersey - 10/01/08 at 10:20 AM

Raeli - Model

Huntington, WV

22 / F - Attached

Posted: 10/01/08 at 07:06 PM

i need a little 8-ball to keep around that has different responses from you to help me make decisions all the time.

Jersey - Moderator

Jersey, 0

28 / F - Other

Posted: 10/02/08 at 10:53 AM


	heheh its easy to sound wise when you aren't in the middle of a personal shit storm

pillasco

Duncanville, TX

26 / M - Single

Posted: 10/05/08 at 02:32 PM


	I waited a bit before I went decided to get a phd... there are a lot of pros and cons I have run into if you ever wanna know about it all... let me know... haha just too much to jam up your journal with.